Happy Monday everyone!
Finally it seems to be getting warmer and sunnier after all the snowing and raining that we all have endured lately. It can only get better now even with the unpredictability of the UK weather, so good on us ladies!
Today, I would like to talk about something unsavoury and highly embarrassing. I have been pondering about whether to write about it for a while now, but just asked my sexier half and he thought it was amusing, so here it goes. I have a confession to make, a confession that will make you cringe, or hopefully relate. The fact is for some time now, I can not stop shooting a fairy, bottom burping and sadly cutting the cheese too. Call it whatever, but it doesn’t get prettier.
I’m by no means fat at the moment (just pregnancy fat, still UK size 8 in maternity dresses), but it’s happening on a minute-by-minute basis, non stop, uncontrollably- as if I was 200 kg heavy and eating all the wrong foods. It has never happened to me before, I was always able to control myself with a clear degree of visibility ahead to help me control it – until now.
When it does happen, I try to pretend it was someone else (although it is just us two in the flat), try to speak about something excitedly all of the sudden, or try to scratch my head or leg vigorously-as if to say the sound came from there. And then he stops, looks at me, and says the unfortunate ‘Did you just fart?’ The nightmare question that I always hope he won’t ask and before I can even answer it, it happens again and again, and so there is nothing I can utter in my defence anymore.

So, I got on to the Google machine to find out what it is and what to do about it. This is what I found on the Mayo clinic website:

In early pregnancy, before your uterus is big enough to crowd your intestines, pregnancy hormones are hard at work. The increase in progesterone slows digestion, providing more time for gas to be produced. Your body responds by removing the gas with burps and farts.

As your uterus enlarges, your intestines are shifted and crowded in your abdomen. This slows digestion even more. Your expanding uterus also pushes on your stomach, which can increase a feeling of bloating.

As if this weren’t enough, the muscle-relaxing effect of pregnancy hormones leaves you less able to control the passing of gas. Before pregnancy you might have been able to hold your gas, but now your muscles don’t respond as well. This can lead to some embarrassing moments.

Hallelujah! I have finally been freed and absolved! I can now tell him that he is insensitive and I have so many issues to deal with as of now, so least he can do is be supportive and not make me feel uncomfortable!
There it is ladies, there isn’t anything you can do about it, this is a sad side effect of being pregnant. Only thing you can do is to make a joke out of it, like I’m trying to do and not even think about what happens when you are asleep.

Mayo clinic also gives some suggestions of what you can do to lesson the symptoms:

Get moving. With your health care provider’s OK, exercise can stimulate digestion — helping things to move along faster. Watch what you eat. Avoid foods that tend to cause gas, such as fried or fatty foods, onions, cauliflower and cabbage. Watch what you drink. If milk seems to cause gas, try drinking it icy cold. Keep carbonated drinks to a minimum.Don’t eat too much at once. Try smaller, more frequent meals.

All I can say is try to avoid friends or in-laws as much as you can at this stage. Don’t feel too guilty, after all you and your sweetheart should share everything together…or so they say. So breathe a sigh of relief, follow the above advice, ‘keep calm and carry on’.